Entering Level Two

I realize today that I am entering a totally new phase in my life. Yes, I have been in love before. Yes, I have had affections for someone and seen myself sending the rest of my life with them, but never before have the feelings been mutual.

All through my life I have been living under some sort of authority figure. Mother and Father, brother and Mother. Grandmother. Never have I lived alone, left to my own devices.

Now I know that I have always told myself and everyone around me that I do not want to go directly from parental home into husband home. I have insisted on living alone for a little while. “Find myself” if you will. Earlier this year I stated this fact to my Mother and she ignored it. I was not thinking straight you see.

Now I am in the process of moving in with my beloved Fuckwit. How does this affect me? What about my whole rant about staying alone? I do not know the answers to this yet. I am still thinking. The only thing I do know is that the window of opportunity to live alone has passed. I do not want to live alone anymore, not now that my Fuckwit has entered my life. I mean really, how the hell am I supposed to now go live on my own but spend most of my time here anyway. It just doesn’t make sense. So I cohabitate with The Fuckwit and see where life leads. It is all we can do at the end of the day. Life happens, you flow with it.